Thursday, November 23, 2017

Thanks for the Memories - 2017 Was Amazballs

Xander-Bear Productions is excited to announce that it received a MIBBY (Music Industry Breakout Business of the Year) award for its movies produced by Claire and me, directed by Claire and me, and starring Claire and me.  Our approach has been to give a nod to the classics, while remaining relevant to the current culture, especially now that there are so many important stories to be told.
A holiday favorite, “Guest Cottage – Austin” celebrates the tenth anniversary of The Holiday and has audiences believing in love again.  New York multi-millionaire Jack trades his razor and $5,000 custom suits for a scruffy beard and tattered jeans as he heads to an Austin rental cottage for a getaway with his faithful pup Roscoe.  Rose, a beautiful and brilliant biotech exec who is housesitting for her best friend in the main residence is mistaken for a member of the housekeeping staff.  Tensions mount and sparks fly between the perfectly matched “odd couple.”
“Mikey Moves” (the prequel to Magic Mike), twerked its way to the top spot in July.  Shy and awkward Mikey lives in economically challenged Techwood Homes.  When he forms unexpected bonds within a group of tough kids, they learn from each other and are propelled to new levels of confidence and success.  In a move that surprises everyone, Mikey wins the heart of Buckhead barista and performing arts major Brooke.


“Wedding Crashers – Gen M” traces the crazy antics of a group of eight former fraternity brothers as they crisscross the country for a year of surprise ‘getting-engaged’ parties, engagement parties, bachelor parties, rehearsal dinners and weddings.  At their annual New Year’s Eve get-together, exhausted and broke, the guys ponder whether they should have pooled their money to buy a communal beach house instead (#foreshadowing, #sequel). 
“Crocnado Alaska” is the real-life story of heroism and survival chronicling Australian storm chasers Oliver and Charlotte Dundee as they rescue the city of Nome after Super Typhoon Lan wreaks havoc by depositing thousands of monster-sized crocodiles throughout the metropolis. 
In “Downhill Rewound,” Richard (Dick) Junior vanishes while attending the opening of his family’s luxury hotel in Moscow.  Super spies Alex Blonde and Blonde Girl Blaire set out on a mission through Siberia to find the spoiled mogul.  Suspense mounts as they realize the key to bringing Dick home lays in the dark Web and their only hope hinges on gaining the trust of a group of Russian call girls.
In “Colombiana – Loving Pablo,” CIA agent Jason Storm infiltrates the Medellin Cartel.  While deep under-cover as Pablo Cordova, Jason’s feelings grow for sweet American school teacher Amelia.  When Pablo disappears while incarcerated on a minor infraction, Amelia fears he has been double-crossed by the Cartel and the corrupt local government.  Armed with a battery of automatic weapons, Amelia, a/k/a Colombian double-agent Delia Olivella (plot twist), mounts a one-woman war against his adversaries to free Pablo.  The ending will blow your mind as the two escape in a blaze of glory.
We thank our fans for your support over the past amazing year and for this award; and leave you with these thoughts:  Open your minds, and your hearts and your arms.  Give a hand and a hug.  Give hope.  Stand up, sit down, kneel, walk or run to keep fighting for the best part of humanity.  Keep reaching for the stars.  They are closer than you think.

Saturday, December 24, 2016

Mystery of the Footprints

As we rang in the new year, all indications were that 2016 would be a normal year. 

That was, until 12:05 a.m. when a shadowy figure rushed by Clairebear and me, and firmly pressed a piece of paper in my hand. 

Tempted to drop it like an empty gum wrapper, the force of its delivery told me to look at it. 

"Hey man, what the heck is this?" I asked as I urgently looked for the figure who disappeared just as quickly as he appeared. Haunted by the message and my curious origins, CB and I packed our bags and headed to Johns Hopkins Hospital, birth certificate in hand. Would anyone remember Baby Boy Doe?  

As we stood in the lobby, paralyzed with uncertainty, a doctor hurried by. "What took you so long?  Follow the footprints in the snow," he said, and then he was gone. 
I pulled out my phone and Googled "1990 Johns Hopkins" and was shocked by a story about a baby boy - parents unknown, who was kidnapped from the hospital. Police tracked footprints to a Costa Rican restaurant that had mysteriously closed just days before when its owner Papi disappeared. 

The next day, CB and I boarded a plane for San Jose and made our way to Cartago.  We missed Papi by one day. 
He and his secret were on their way to St. Lucia, where we arrived later that week. 
Deep in the jungle, we found Papi.  I tried to explain who I was, hoping he would recognize me as the baby he may have once known. All he would say was, "Dos Alejandros. El halcon."

Confused, exhausted, and with nothing more to go on, we headed back to New York to submerge ourselves once again in bacon. And there it was during our layover in Atlanta - this guy was on TV talking about how he was born conjoined at the hip to his twin, separated by a famous neurosurgeon, kidnapped from the hospital and hidden away in the jungle for years.
We're back in New York now, albeit with more questions than answers.  And, as we regroup, our message is simply this:  "Eat more bacon," and . . .

Thursday, December 15, 2016


Ssshhhhh!  Don't tell you know who . . .

But, here's a peak at Potus and Hillary, my little Christmas surprises.

 And now for a PSA:  The Google Chrome extension "Make America Kittens Again," when added to your Google Chrome browser automatically detects images of the Donald on the web and changes them to photos of adorable kittens.    
You're welcome!
Oh yeah, and all those trips to the spa?  I wasn't really getting Botox.  I was at the allergist getting shots.  I'm good to go.

Bacon is Making Jam Great Again

Bon appetite.


Thursday, December 24, 2015

Six Degrees

Somewhere between Bali and Croatia, as I pondered the meaning of life, it came to me:
Bacon is the answer. 

And so was born Six Degrees - Bacon by Xander, a gourmet dining experience featuring all things bacon.

Now open in Manhatten, celebrity Chef Kevin wows discerning diners with applewood smoked magic! 


We can't wait for you to see and be seen at Six Degrees!

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

Pasta Night

Dinner at home with the Pastabear and the little Pastafarians.

Homemade bacon infused pasta with sun dried tomato and goat cheese sauce.

Bon appetite, foodies!


Wednesday, November 25, 2015

Flying Under the Radar

We here at the house of Xander were flying high after New York Fashion Week in February with the debut of the Alexander line for men.  Thanks to GQ for naming us the breakout star of the show!

Since then, we've been flying under the radar, starting with six months on a lobster boat . . .
Followed by weeks down under with Clairebear . . .
Meditating in Bali . . .
And bird watching in Croatia . . .
Before ending up in England for a month with my second favorite aunt, Liz.
After nine months, we're heading back to the real world to put the final touches on the house of Xander's next venture ~ Yum!